To home school or not to home school, that is the question.

I found this quote by Charlotte Mason via Simple Mom.

For a few years, I've had it in the back of my mind that I'd switch to home schooling when my children were old enough for middle school. Despite the plethora of horror stories my babysitters have told me over the years, I don't have anything against the public school system. Aside from the expected routine traumas of adolescence, I liked public school. But as an adult, I envy the freedom that it seems like home schooling families enjoy. I love the thought of finishing school work by noon, so kids can fill the afternoon with fun stuff like learning another language, becoming really good at an instrument, or playing sports (or do they even have sports?). And mostly I want to delete crazy evenings from my life. I despise the drive-thru lifestyle of rushing from one activity to the next, only to get home to start homework at 9pm. Do you think it's possible to not be that family?

I should also be clear. There is NO WAY I could do this myself. My schedule is way too chaotic, and I'm much too undisciplined to be responsible for something as important as someone's education (which is why I clicked on this article in the first place). The only way I could make this work is by hiring someone. But I've never heard of anyone doing that. So again, maybe I'm dreaming? 

My other big concern is that my kids are very social, especially my oldest. And I have homebody bordering on hermit tendencies. I would hate for that to rub off on them. 

So I decided to put it out there to hear what you guys think. Do you have experience and/or an opinion about home schooling? Will my children become pasty agoraphobics? If you do home school, how do you avoid that? And where should I start? So far googling has done nothing but make the process seem incredibly overwhelming.

This is me officially soliciting your advice. 

(thank you) :)

Comments

[Roxanna (miguelina)]

No advice here, just an admission that the thought has crossed my mind. Good luck in your search!

[Amy C]

The thought has crossed my mind several times too because of the same reasons you mentioned. It's always there because of the way the school system is right now (now money, increasing class sizes & decreasing special classes). And about hiring someone........My brother went through some hard times and my dad considered doing the same. They never did, but there was a couple of teachers in my hometown that did just that. Retired teachers or young teachers that wanted to be with their kids more. But my brother is only 1 child. I have no idea about 3 at different ages - if you could find someone or what they charge. But ex-teachers are the place to start looking :) And I will also say that I'm amazed at the number of people I know or follow online that homeschool. It seems to be growing by leaps and bounds. I have close a friend who will be doing it next year, so I'll be watching her closely ;)

[xanthe]

I hear you with all those reasons, it's not the done thing here in the UK but I'm always inspired by the possibilities, as this method would suit my youngest totally. One of my online friends is http://freeplaylife.com/ check her out, she can tell you all about the benefits and joy it's brought her family.

All the best with your decisions x.

[Jen]

Im a school counselor, admitted hermit-wannabe, and mom. Right now our only son is at home with me (summer vacation-wheeeee!) and I'm in hermit mode. I totally get the fear of yours that your kids would lose their social nature if you homeschooled them. There are times when I think our son would benefit from homeschool, as he learns differently. But sometimes it is good for him to be at school too. No solution is perfect. Since we are both educators (husband and I) we are doing educational stuff with him outside of school to supplement what he isn't getting at school because he doesn't pay attention. I think that while I'd love to quit work and stay home with him, he wouldn't benefit from it. What do your kids think about the idea? Some of my students would LEAP at the chance to not be at school and be at home, and some wouldn't care for it. Taking off my mom hat and putting on my school counselor hat, I can tell you that empowering the student in their educational choices goes miles in their success. So if you lay out all the options and give them some input/option they may give you more direction? Just a thought:). Good luck!

[Joy]

One of the greatest benefits of homeschool is tailoring education for each child - the pace, the pauses, the structure, the emphasis, etc. My mom homeschooled myself and my four sisters. We are currently ages 30, 28, 27, 20, and 18. All five of us have attended college. Two of us have bachelor's degrees, and the youngest two are still pursuing theirs. Among us, we have school addicts (myself and girl #4), social butterflies (girls #2 and #5), and one go-with-the-flow (girl #3). We grew up in Phx, AZ, and have lived here in San Antonio since 1995. I felt we had an excellent balance of academic excellence, extracurricular activities, and social outlets. It was an intentional choice by our parents to provide these for us. Of the three of us who are grown and married, two are staying at home with young children. One is homeschooling her children (ages 5 and 3). One sends her children to private school. I am working full time, without children, but would love to homeschool when I have kids. Both my parents have college degrees, and I think that contributed to our family's success in raising homeschooled children. All of us had an A or A/B average at a university level, so our primary education was successful in preparing us for college-level academics. In college, I met many fellow homeschoolers. Some of them, "you could tell" they had been homeschooled. They were quiet, shy, socially awkward, and unfashionably dressed (your traditional "nerd"). Most of those I met however, I would never have guessed they had been homeschooled. I graduated summa cum laude with a double major, and have had successful career growth since graduation. My social skills allow me to work in a position where I interact regularly with millionaire clients, handling their concerns and requests. I guess I'm trying to say - we turned out okay! I was able to graduate high school a year early because school had become boring for me, so my mom let me skip 10th grade. (We literally ordered 11th grade books the year after I completed the 9th grade books). That was such an advantage, because I also started college a year early. Then I spent five years in college, completing a double major, and graduating at the same age as my peers. As kids, we took field trips all over the city with other homeschool families. My mom started homeschool groups when we lived in places where there were none. We did co-ops, made yearbooks with our homeschool friends, we took vacations during the school year when places were less crowded. We took music lessons, dance lessons, played in church youth bands, and would have participated in sports if we or or parents had been remotely interested. (We were always doing outdoor activities and eating well, so we stayed fit and slender. As adults, two of my sisters have competed in multiple triathlons). By the time we were in high school, we were leading events and groups at our church, and mentoring children younger than us. Homeschool is NOT for everyone though, I am convinced. The amount of dedication required by the parents to provide everything for their child is huge. A school system provides many things for a child. Then again, it lacks so many things children need. My primary complaint with a school system (including daycare) versus a homeschool system, is that children are being raised by each other. Most adults, save the crazy ones, will be a better influence and model for a child than other children. In daycares, and in schools, children are primarily being influenced by each other. Even the most well-behaved child is still a child, and has immature and uneducated ways of interacting that are a poor influence on other chilld. You know how to raise your child better than their classmates or their teachers do. That is the benefit of homeschool. As far as locating someone to homeschool your children for you, there are many resources in San Antonio. Search for homeschool co-ops, forums, etc. You may find a mom who has completed homeschool for her own children, and rather than going to work, would enjoy homeschooling other children. Or a mom who has two or three of her own kids, who could easily add a couple more. I will ask my mom for some additional specific resources. So I guess the questions to ask youself are, what resources would you need to homeschool your children? List at least the ones you can think of. Then ask, if you had all those resources available at a price you could afford, would you feel that homeschool is ultimately better for your children and your family than the alternatives? What are all the reasons you would want to homeschool? What is the value of those reasons? For example, having evening family time might be a reason, but how much value does that reason have, compared to say, imparting your deepest values and your faith to your children (which is much more likely to occur via homeschool)? I know all of this is such a hot topic, but it is a highly personal decision. If your reasons are powerful enough, will be the strength you need for the work ahead. Good luck.

[DOUBLE V]

I think it depends on the child. Would seem easier if you hired someone and they also stayed social somehow. I could not do it personally myself. I would get lazy and decide to take a vaca that day or the next or the next til my 14 year old was still in 5th grade. No guarentee eitehr way chica. Good luck though. I want to hear what you decide.
Luv ya !
V V

[Jen Heff]

For the record...I haven't read the comments, however.......I love my kids WAY too much to homeschool them. Sort of the same reason I drink coffee. It's for their protection.

[chris]

I love the idea of home schooling - for the lower grade levels. I taught public school for 18 years (high school English) and now I teach college classes online. I think that (after seeing my daughter's junior high experience) that trying to put older kids in home school would be extremely difficult. My daughter, while her academic school experience wasn't good and I continue to fight to get her the services she needs, had a wonderful social experience. Between the dance team, the friends, coming home and telling me the funny things which happened during her day, well, she would really be losing out if I home schooled her. While strong academics are good (and heaven knows I would love the flexibility and "free time" I saw my neighbors have during their home school experience) the social skills my daughter has developed are invaluable and will take her far in life. I recall kids I went to school with years ago. There were many kids who did poorly academically in school but were extremely strong socially and turned out just fine - some even better than "fine." Then there were those who did well academically and floundered in life due to lack of social skills. I don't think there is a right answer, but if they are established with a network within their school and have interests in school which they are pursuing, I think that should not be disrupted at this point in time.

[Sue]

at thepioneerwoman.com, their is a tab for homeschooling and part of that has become community based questions. Families with questions about potentially homeschooling submit their questions and get comments from experienced homeschoolers. I've never seen anything about hiring someone to home school your kids, so that could probably be a great question for them. The site in general has dealt with the whole socialization issue and you could find it very reassuring.

[Nota Supermom]

I've home schooled for nine years now and I think the middle school years are the best ones.

Let me know if I can answer any questions for you. I've home schooled two to high school graduation and into college and didn't mess up either one.

[Laura PC]

I think homeschool is a good fit for everything you cited and more. Especially the time spent together as a family. Our time with our children is so short. I especially appreciated the ability to specifically taylor lessons according to each child's learning style. As for social activities, we met every Friday with other homeschool families for lessons. The parents teaching their special interests for example; woodwork, music, geology, and computer. We were able to take advantage of free days at the Zoo, De Young Museum, Academy of Sciences, etc. in San Francisco. For sports, we had our boys take Jujitsu, little league, soccer, pop warner football, tennis not all at the same time but depending on age and schedules. My younger son got his B.S. in Art Studio before his older brother. The older one decided to get married but now is going to University and finishing his senior year majoring is psychology, minor in criminal justice. Each child is unique. If you have a Church family, you can find out who is homeschooling and put out feelers if anyone might be interested in taking your children. Have a family discussion. If there's interest perhaps you can do a trial period, make assessments, if adjustments are needed you can adjust or let it go at least you experienced it. Godspeed...

[starrlife]

My sister is a teacher who stayed home and homeschooled all three of her kids (who are all very well adjusted and smart adults now).
She reports that in NY they have a huge network of other homeschoolers so that they had lots of trips and social contact. A lot of homeschoolers are Christian as well I find. Perhaps a compromise of a different kind of school, Montessori or a Charter school? I like the idea of a teacher who would be hired by a parent? I also am a big proponent of only one afterschool activity at a time - I do not want to be in a rat race of activities with my daughter.
But I know I couldn't do it....Not only am I pretty much a hermit (after intensely working with people all week) with very low self motivation and inner structure (thank god for work to get me out of my pj's!) but I can't remember anything from school! Even helping with homework is a challenge...

[Leslie]

My oldest is just starting kindergarten and I've thought about home schooling. I don't think I have the patience, and I'm not sure my child would be able to learn well from me. Hiring someone to do would probably be expensive. Have you considered a Waldorf or Montessori school? Kristen at Motherhood Uncensored just posted about this yesterday too. I think she homeschools: http://bit.ly/rouxJR

[Kijiji Trois Rivieres jobs]

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