imperfectly perfect.
Thursday, May 14, 2009 at 10:55PM *Starting this out with a bit of a side note* A couple weeks ago my friend DD had a few people over to watch some sort of fight on television. I think it was an important one, because there was yelling upstairs. But I couldn't be too sure because I spent the majority of my night on the porch. Drinking wine. Lots of wine. So much wine, that at one point in the night I cornered poor Katy's husband, Damon, with my "Cancer Talk". I'm guessing it was because he's a surgeon, so of course he would be DYING to hear every detail of what I'd been through. Probably about as much as I adore reading through camera manuals in my free time. And on weekends with friends. Ugh...embarrassing!
Especially because the truth is that I'm not sure how to talk about my brush with cancer. There are so many people who've been through much worse. People who are brave and heroic, who have to face death and the real possibility of leaving their children. I hyperventilated on my bed just waiting for anesthesia. So there's something in me that feels like the Lucky Brat of cancer survivors. That I haven't earned the right to talk about how profoundly it changed me. But it totally did. I used to live as if everything was ALL or NOTHING. If it wasn't "perfect", it was crap. And that meant that I would neglect it, until I felt like I'd be able to do it perfectly. This perspective affected everything. If I couldn't fit into the size 5's, then I might as well eat an entire pizza and buy stock in elastic waistbands. If I didn't have time to get my car cleaned and waxed, then why not let the kids treat it like their own personal dump land. This of course applied to my house, too. If I wasn't able to buy everything I wanted at Pier One, then I might as well not have photos up on the walls FOR FIVE YEARS.
So what might seem like the simple act of hanging pictures, for me, is huge. It's one way that I've decided to live my life TODAY...however imperfect and messy it may be. It's a way of being grateful for what I have, rather than focusing on what might be lacking. And acknowledging that life will always be imperfect, and that's okay. Even beautiful.
So my little decorating spree started with this painting. I bought the canvas last year, with the intention of painting a "5" on it (for each family member). Finally got it out the other night, and did it. Using paints I already had, and the kids' brushes. "Just enough is plenty", is from my amazing cousin Leah. Those words had been banging around in my head for days after reading them. They seemed to be exactly what the painting needed.
The pillow is from Pier One. I almost didn't buy it because there were two others that had all the "perfect" colors. The "shoulds" in my head almost tangled me up. But I'd promised myself that I was done ever buying anything again, that I didn't genuinely love to look at. So this was it. As it turns out, you can throw a bunch of stuff that you like, together. And it all has a way of working itself out. Next project: finally getting photos into those frames (below). Hey, it's one step at a time, people.
Remember my adventures in Mullin? Well these had been propped up against the wall for MONTHS. I'd been procrastinating because, once again, I didn't have the "perfect" frames. In the end, these are mostly all frames I already had. Just painted them white. And I can't tell you how happy it makes me to look at my grungy pictures against the fanciness of the velvet chandelier. WHY do I ever WAIT to do this stuff?!
View from the living room. I chose the plants because they remind me of the Ti-leaves that used to surround our house on Maui, when we were growing up. Ti-leaves are supposed to bring you good luck, so I'm adopting that notion for these plants, too. And don't the pot colors make your belly happy?!
Clearly, I got on a roll, because the next thing I knew I was painting the TV cabinet, too. Still not finished with it, but it's better than the primer that had been covering it for almost TWO YEARS.
And FINALLY got the family photos up from last Christmas. I bought them unfinished at Michael's, and J spray painted them with chalkboard paint. Love how they turned out.
The kids were getting inspired by all the painting, so I let them play too.
Gotta love that concentration.
And here are a few fun shots from Mother's Day. We busted out the waterslide. Mimi always takes a thousand years to get up the nerve to go down. Complete with her floatie on. :)
Almost down Mimi...you can do it!!
Did it! Phew! :)
And that's it for now. Have an awesome weekend everybody! xo
Reader Comments (33)
Answering your questions: Jason and my stepdad made the table. I finished it. And it was a total accident how it turned out, but I love it. The brown color is "spice berry" and the green is "herbal garden" (both from Behr). :)
Pigx
that would be me in all areas of my life...my business, my body, my family, my home. all of it suffers at some point because of my weird control freak - slobfest rollercoaster. but NO MORE!!!!!!! i am living in the here and now, and my 5 is perfectly imperfect and a wonderful and blessed and with an embarrassing amount of riches, physicaly,spirittuallly,family wise, you name it. and this summer I AM GOING TO EMBRACE IT! I AM GOING TO CHOOSE TO LOVE IT! I will with out a doubt be a ble to say... 5 -plenty is just enough. thank you for giving me this epiphany (no pun intended, but your bags are freakin' awesome)! I want my clan to know that we could enjoy our lives no matter what the sitch is. we have God, we have the commitment of each other, and we are a family DANG IT! so get off my chubby little butt and DO SOMETHInG that makes me feel fabulous and unapologetic about the stuff that seems weird or over the top . I am taking control and choosing to be free and wild and WHO CARES what the neighbors say! so THERE! :) so if ai feel the need to put a pink flamingo in my yard, just 'cause i love it....so be it!
thanks Maile
from my gypsy hear to yours
~tomi
thanks Milei
have a super fab weekend!!!!!!
from my gypsy heart, to yours!
~tomi