Man-ssage

Okay, for the record, this shot was totally in focus until I uploaded it here. And this has only been a problem since I purchased a mac. If any of you can help, I would greatly appreciate it. A while ago someone told me that once I go mac I will never go back. So far, I'm calling BS on that. This damn mac has caused me more problems in the last two months than my Dell did in seven years. No, my suit-ladened-tie-sporting Dell was not sexy. But at least I could find my pictures. 

So, I'm taking an intermission on the Summer Recap because it annoys me to blog stuff that's so far in the past. Plus, I've always wanted to blog a trip in real time. So. Here it is. Here I Am. In Phoenix. In all my greasy haired glory. I arrived this afternoon and decided that I would take an hour break from my work-a-holic ways.

So I walk into the "spa" for a massage. Only to find out that "spa" meant "one old man, sporting an oil belt in a dimly lit room"

Me: "So, Jamie is a girl right?"

The receptionist: "No, Jamie is a man."

Me: "Oh. Um. Shoot. I usually request a woman. I've never had a man... I'm just not sure I could relax as much."

The receptionist: "Jamie is happily married with kids". 

Oh, phew. So he's not going to try to elope with, or impregnate me.

Receptionist: increasingly irritated, "...he's like my brother"

Me: increasingly pressured, " ...Oh. Well then I'm sure it's okay.

*Sidenote: I totally get that I'm the freak in this scenario, and that I should be perfectly fine with a man-ssage.

And that's what I'm telling myself when he knocks on the door. Introduces himself with an overcompensatingly firm handshake. I realize he's old enough to be my dad. And now this is getting even weirder. So I close my eyes, pretend I'm somewhere else. And then I think how ironic that is. Because usually when I'm pretending to be somewhere else, I'm getting a massage. But this time I'm pretending that I'm floating high above the earth. Fully clothed. Wearing spanx. And a metal exoskeleton.

Then a few minutes passed. I managed to get over my neuroses. And at the end it felt a little like how one might feel after public speaking or cliff-diving. Happy you were brave enough to get through it, but glad it was over. And yes. That is called The Extreme Spa Experience. Go big or go home people. 

Okay, so enough of my spa-ga. In case you're wondering why I'm really here, I'm working on a project with Promise, who is one of the most incredibly talented people I know. For real. If you've been to her site, you know this too. And if you haven't, go now. And grab a glass of wine because you'll be there a while. And as a huge bonus I also get to meet the amazing Melissa Jill. I've been stalking her blog for years! We've been trying to meet forever. And it finally worked out! I'm super excited, and will keep you posted with photos as soon as I can. That is, if my Diva Mac is in a good mood.

peace. xo

Mom Part 2.0

So after my netted palm tree hat debacle, I realized that life could get much worse than room service at the Four Seasons. And then it did get a million percent better. The first person I met was Meredith (my roomy, and fellow Shutter Sister). She is poetry. She speaks the same way she writes. She paints pictures with words, and has a way of seeing the world in a way that makes you want to live in it. I adore her.

Somewhere along the way we met up with Tracey, who I've been following online for gosh, maybe 4 or 5 years. We've worked together on Shutter Sisters and other projects, so it felt almost as if I'd just seen her last week. And I think that's what amazed me most about online relationships turning three dimensional...they are completely lacking in uncomfortable formalities. And if you've never met Tracey in person, she is immediately engaging and comfortable to be around. This is us playing around in the lamp in her room.

Seeing ourselves in each other. 

Their versions are here and here. 

I know this is blurry, but I love Meredith's expression here. 

Here's one of my images. Seeing it framed with all the other beauties felt surreal. It was an honor to be included. 

Karen is another one who I felt like I'd known a million years. Ten seconds after we met we were sitting on a hotel bed talking about life and people and the beauty of different. Her insight is fascinating; her passion is contagious. And her reaction to Lola made the last two years of stress and late nights and tears TOTALLY WORTH IT.

 I think it's safe to say I'm totally in for BlogHer 2010. Counting down, in fact. 

jumping the shark

I had never been to a blogging event before. My friends were lovingly referring to it as the "trekkie convention". I didn't know what to expect. I had only ever met two people from the online world before. And although they are dear friends today, I still felt like the new girl on the first day of school. 

To make matters worse, I was dressed up as a 60s housewife, complete with a NETTED HAT. It was a Mad-Men party. And I was telling myself, "Hey, I'm a big girl, I don't need a babysitter, it'll be great." So me and my netted hat walked out of my hotel room. It may have taken 30 seconds to hit the elevator button. But when the doors opened into the lobby I put my shoulders back. Me and my heels and my netted hat were going to have a drink and meet new friends and it was going to be great. 

Orrrr, maybe not so much. 

Me and my netted hat walked into the dimly-lit clusters of friends mingling and laughing. My mom's words from junior high echoed in my head, "No one is as aware of you as you are of yourself." That's right, I'm just an un-noticeable fly on the wall. I scanned the room for familiar faces. Recognizing no one, my netted hat began to feel bigger as if it was now bulging into the ceiling tiles. I circled the room scanning... there has to be someone here. Twice. Three times. Four times. Me and my hat that was now a palm tree circled the room. Like a shark. Only I was anything but predatorial, and I had a gigantic netted growth on my forehead.

When I got back into my hotel room, the phone rang. I think my friend DD has a special radar for embarrassing moments. She lives for and thrives on them as if they are sustenance. But I knew her laugh, even if it was at me, would still make me smile. 

She asked, "So...how was it?"

"I sharked the party."

"What?"

"Me and my netted hat. We sharked the party together. Until my hat got so big that I had to leave." 

And her laughter did help. And then we laughed really hard together. And then I said a prayer thanking God for the mini bar. 

I took these the next morning because I knew the light coming through that sheer curtain would flatten out my wrinkles. Looking again now, it's a pretty good depiction of the emotions that had been going through me the night before. 

The weekend took an indescribable turn for the better the next morning after I met Meredith and found Tracey, and met so many other amazing, inspiring, honest, authentic...the adjectives could go on forever women. But my posts have been so long lately. I'm thinking I'll save those pics and stories for tomorrow. Or please read her words. She explains exactly how I felt, only I'd never be able to write it that eloquently.  

In other news, I started the new blog for Epiphanie! It's not linked to the site yet and still a work in progress, but I'd love it if you came by to say hi! :)

See you tomorrow with Part 2.  :)

Oregon

I stopped in Eugene, Oregon on my way home to visit my mom and Bill. At the time it was a curious twist of events that had ended me there. But with the manic pace of my life over the past few months, I realize now that it was something my soul really needed. You know when life gets crazy, there are occasional indulgences: pedicures, spa days, girl's trips. Then there is an other worldly kind of relaxation called Being At Your Mom's House. I'd honestly forgotten what it feels like be TOTALLY TAKEN CARE OF. It was like visiting a planet that I used to live on. One where someone says, "Just sleep until you wake up", and where delicious food miraculously appears before you. Where it's okay to talk or be quiet. To stay in your pajamas. Or read. Or nap. Where the end of the day is celebrated with a nice glass of wine, and lengthy stories about your life and heart. Oh yes. It was much needed.

Like muffin tops. Yep, tops. Because sometimes one needs to edit out the stuff that sucks. And that would includes muffin bottoms.  

My mom has been collecting heart rocks for the last 17 years...so long that she's quite the snob about it if you ask me. Like, she has rules...you can't LOOK for heart rocks. They have to find you. Each one of these symbolizes a particular memory that she can tell you all about. And what's so neat is that they're not all as monumental as an anniversary or birthday. Some of them just say "grow" or "freedom". She's really cute like that.

This shot is blurry because I barely grabbed it. It's Bill dancing with himself spontaneously. And I'm posting it because it so perfectly shows the spirit of who they are. My mom and Bill are like Experts At Enjoying Life. It never matters where they are, who they're with, even in the most dire circumstances...they will find SOME way to make it meaningful, and have fun. I wish I was more like that actually.

I bought this candle for my mom when I was in Canada because it was guava-scented. When we were little in Maui, we used to for walks and pick guavas from the sides of the road. The funny thing was that the candle actually smelled more like a lilikoi. But it was okay because I think it's been 17 years since either one of us had smelled one of those either. 

Us. At one of the most beautiful wineries I'd ever been to. 

Dinner. Where much uninterrupted conversation was enjoyed.  :)

Thank you Mom and Bill. Love you. xo

Canada: Part Three

The cute Barteski-Kostenchuks!  :)

love this one... :)

Penn's expression cracks me up!
Thanks Kal, Dan, Pilot, Penn, Crash, and Norman the Frenchie.  :)